Summation

It took us a bit more than a year and two rounds of hellish mood swings and weight gain and emotional outbursts on clomid to conceive miss e.

We found out after a long weekend with the in-laws and my bestie (le) and were thrilled beyond compare.

What really helped put things in perspective was that the long road to conceive resulted in a baby - and the appreciation of this miracle was beyond what most can understand...she was for us our miracle baby whose existance had been in our mind for a long long time, making her realization all the more amazing and exciting for us.

I have to say, there are many women who go through tougher trials to try to conceive that jb and I's quest. And there are many women who never do realize this dream. It is such a sad situation - how does one come to terms with not being able to conceive? My own mother could not conceive, and after three very devastating miscarriages, decided to adopt.

So I am aware how lucky I've been - and that I should not feel too terribly sorry for myself. I just know the heart-ache of a process inwhich one cannot know for sure a successful result until success actually happens - it is a very blind, uncontrollable goal...and that can be so heart-wrenching and daunting and draining on relationships all around.

I hope anyone who reads this blog and struggles is surrounded by family and friends who not only understand the emotional upheaval infertility causes, but know how to support and not degrade any decision one makes as a result of her/his own heart-ache and journey.

Until next time,

xoxo,

SB

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