So, I've been on the edge a lot lately. A LOT. Around me, circulating quite quickly, is the air of change. It's something else, my friends.
It's sort of overwhelming me a bit, in fact.
Last week I learned that my daycare provider is ready to move on with her life, which means that my children, whom I hate leaving at the best of times, are now losing the mommy-figure they've known since age 1 for e, and 4 months for dr. b. And the idea of this hurts me for several reasons. I was actually quite shocked at my own reaction to this, in all honesty; like all other relationships in life, there were times I thought maybe the provider was not a good fit.
But now? Well now I have no choice.
My children have only ever been left with her. I entrusted her. That's a huge statement. And now, I must find someone new. It's emblematic of my children growing up; of time marching on; of life ever-changing.
And I have cried several tears over this fact.
I have to get used to the fact that no matter what, we are all growing up. My babies will have to get used to someone new and I will have to get used to this transient life - their transient life.
Can you imagine me on their first day of school? Oh GOD. I just want to envelop them in my arms and keep them near me always.
But I cannot.
And now this truth is becoming glaringly more evident.
And I will have to either quit with the tears or I am not sure how I am going to deal with all of life's other surprises.
Anyone else finding change hard?