February 17, 2010

Cogito Ergo Sum


Valentine's inspired (mind you I bought my own chocolate)

Chocolate. A Haiku

Choc-o-late is bliss
that melts sweet on my tongue
pure. simple. pleasure

Heidi Pratt

Plastic. Barbie. Babe.
Chiseled hour-glass. Perfection.
Weeping eyes. Forc'd smile.

An Ode to my Socks

I have a conundrum today, and all days like today.
You see today is the ever, the almighty, the constant -- laundry day.
And, as is the same with every week when I venture to complete,
A full day of laundry -- all folded, put away, and neat.

Something happens between points a and b,
From washer to dryer, there comes a huge issue, you see.
My socks were a pair in the basket before wash day,
But now, there sits three or more singles, wondering what may
Have become of their partners, their pairs, their friends...
Now no longer useful, they fear it's the end.

Because the only thing more sad than one lost piece of foot wear,
Is the one who remains, alone, unusable, bare.
I stand here, one sock in hand,
And I wonder, was this all planned?

Oh red sock, where is your pair?
How did he get lost between here and there?
And what with you now?
Can you stand partnering with a white, or maybe a brown?

The pile of single socks, alone, the sad sorry state;
Wondering how could I have lost their buddy, their mate!
I can see their daggers, they're so angry with me.
How could I be so careless and sloppy?

But I implore with these singles, I beg and I plea
That they understand this conspiracy has nothing to do with me.
It's those machines, the washer, the dryer who play --
They steal your partners, and leave me and you in dismay.

So singles, I know it's true it is you who is most at a loss.
But my pocket book is losing too, because of the cost.
I am mad at those machines, and I conspire to win this fight --
To one day be victorious and have full pairs at the end of the night.
And to save your sadness, your anger, your remorse,
I hope to win and prevent your recourse.

Oh singles I am sad I am mad I am in de - spair!
Since I've ever done laundry they've mocked and stolen one of each pair --
I don't know exactly how it happens. But I know this for sure
between washer and dryer your other lies waiting -- somewhere.


  1. Oh Heidi. That Haiku was awesome. And I find that sometimes chocolate tastes better if I buy it myself.

  2. I LOVE the poetry!

    And I'm glad you told me you like cats. Admitting you have a problem is the first step toward recovery. ;)

  3. Anonymous17.2.10

    k, i love the laundry story.. this has been happening to me more and more often. it's a sick sick game i tell you.. today i decided i would start the fight. i bought hubby a package of 6 socks. all the same. so they're easier to match up. this seems like something kate gosselin would do. and it's another reason i love her. i miss her..
    (sorry for the stream of consciousness)
    ~ your friend, anonimo
    p.s. l and lil' s can always watch something else on tv.. no rush ;)

  4. hahahahahaha that heidi haiku cracked me up. that girl has severe issues!

  5. Anonymous18.2.10

    Oh the forc'd smile..We ladies all know it well...I really enjoyed your Ode to the Sock. So true. I usually don't mind doing laundry (compared to other household chores that involve elbow grease) but it can be very tedious. So many steps: the collecting, sorting, washing, drying, hanging, folding, returning to closet...I rarely get it all done in a single day. Ugh, and bedding -- after the drying you have to *make* the bed too. It reminds me of one of my favourite Stephen Sondheim songs, "Everybody Ought to Have a Maid." A-men.

    I think you probably know who this is from.

    PS: Computer is having surgery. Working on N's computer. Disaster hopefully averted. Diss saved.

  6. thanks for all the comments ladies!

  7. I did not think I would ever say these words, but.....that was a cute sock poem.lol


Thanks for your thoughts!


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