Change is a Good Thing...

So, I've been on the edge a lot lately. A LOT. Around me, circulating quite quickly, is the air of change. It's something else, my friends.

It's sort of overwhelming me a bit, in fact.

Last week I learned that my daycare provider is ready to move on with her life, which means that my children, whom I hate leaving at the best of times, are now losing the mommy-figure they've known since age 1 for e, and 4 months for dr. b. And the idea of this hurts me for several reasons. I was actually quite shocked at my own reaction to this, in all honesty; like all other relationships in life, there were times I thought maybe the provider was not a good fit.

But now? Well now I have no choice.

My children have only ever been left with her. I entrusted her. That's a huge statement. And now, I must find someone new. It's emblematic of my children growing up; of time marching on; of life ever-changing.

And I have cried several tears over this fact.

I have to get used to the fact that no matter what, we are all growing up. My babies will have to get used to someone new and I will have to get used to this transient life - their transient life.

Can you imagine me on their first day of school? Oh GOD. I just want to envelop them in my arms and keep them near me always.

But I cannot.

And now this truth is becoming glaringly more evident.

And I will have to either quit with the tears or I am not sure how I am going to deal with all of life's other surprises.

Anyone else finding change hard?

Tweet

Precious Times

Or, Precious Moments:). E is loving mommy again these days. Seems she's ever a daddy's girl - but today, she was all mommy's! She even wanted me to cuddle her to sleep. How lucky am I? Seriously. I get to be home with my little ones every other day and I get to watch them develop and even be part of the process. I feel so so blessed. And cuddling e for five minutes before she falls to sleep? The best time spent.

I love mommy-hood!
Serena

Tweet

Three and Trying....

e is three. Is she ever. We've been really persisting with the potty-training with her. And she handles it pretty well, I'd say. I do wish, though, that I could climb inside her mind and really understand what's going on in there developmentally. When she accidentally pees in her clothing, I wonder if she understands what's happened, or if it's just a natural, carnal behaviour that we are trying to break?

The peeing messes are not the main subject of this post, mind-you...The real topic is the three year old e and all the new-found attitude hat is beginning to surface...

Don't tell jb, but the other night e peed on his favourite Moroccan rug. She had told me she had to pee, and she was still wearing her 'nap pull-up'. I was so excited that she chose to, rather than pee in the pullup, tell me she wanted to go on the potty, that I hurriedly started to take off her diaper and get her to the potty.

Well, as I am pulling off the pull-up, she is peeing right there. Just like that.

I might have accidentally lost it.

Then e lost it.

(She is, by the way, thoroughly becoming a daddy's girl. She begins to wail and beg for daddy. Little does she know that in situations like this, I am the lamb and jb is the lion. For real. He cannot handle pee messes - poop messes - vomit - spills... You know...)

And then she stomps off to her room, inconsolable. She yells at me in utter anger, 'MOMMY YOU MEAN! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!' and then she wails and wails in a high pitched tone stating and restating that SHE WANTS DADDY.

And of course, drama me (we all know she comes by her emotions honestly), thinks to myself, in my own melodrama moment, that I was the one who laboured for 18 hours with her. I was the one who suffered through her acid reflux and rocked her colicky self for hours on end. I was the one....

Me . 

Me.

 Mommy.

But didn't I already know that daddy was the knight in shining armour and I would likely be the evil, wicked, step mother figure:)...


Oh to be the fun one:)!

haha.

Melodrama over.

For another day.

Can we all imagine this house in ten years? Oh man. There isn't a house big enough to fit both divas...

Tweet

Thrilling Three?

E has come into her own. For real. She's just a gem of a girl. She's peeing on the potty. She's playing games like 'What time is it Mr. Wolf' with five year old kids and managing, she's going into the pool without me. I am in awe. Remember when she was my baby? Yah. Me too. My heart hurts all the time.

She is so excited to see babies now. She loves them. And yet, I still think of her as my little baby.

Time flies, people. Like whip-lash. And it hurts:)

No kidding, Nazareth just came on the TV. fitting, non?

Until next time - let's squeeze our babies tight!

Tweet

Here is my new tips for perfect lips!: http://ping.fm/OFcvW

Tweet

http://ping.fm/CVYh5

Tweet

Time After Time

Dudes. I hate time. It goes way too fast! My son, precocious Dr. B has asserted the fact that he is no longer my little baby. Yes. Indeed. He has taken his first steps. A happy moment, indeed! But just another indication of time flying. Remember when I was upset about his colic? Wasn't that yesterday? Seriously. Actually, remember when my world was all about e and I wrote about it daily and was so heart-broken by the fact that I'd have to leave her?

Well two years later and I am back in that same predicament. Mat Leave conclusion is looming, people, and I am not at all happy about it....

Sigh.

Slow down just a little time. Let me soak up my babes and imprint these memories.

They are so precious.

Tweet

If You Thought You Were Financially Savvy - Here's Your Test!

Okay. So lots of people have offered up thoughts and opinions. And let me preface this money management moment with a compliment to all my friends: while it doesn't take much YOU ALL ARE BETTER AT MONEY MANAGEMENT THAN ME.

However, the BEST Money Manager Award goes to...HRL - and, besides being the smartest and most disciplined person I've come across, she's also the most generous, as she shared MANY tips with me (they ALL blew me away and made me realize that I need to really work harder at this new approach or dollar diet. Because it's a lifestyle not a diet. blah blah).

he he.

Anyway.

She is willing to let me share her tips with y'all!

And to be sure you are aware, although I think it is VERY evident: her family does not do without and her children and hubby are VERY happy with the disciplined choices she's made - she is teaching them all so much about worth and being thankful and consciously planning rather than mindlessly spending: these are invaluable lessons, I think. I wish she had taught me a long time ago!!! ps. I ASKED her for these tips - as I ask all of you for yours. I figure I cannot go it alone, since I am clueless.

Alright - enough said. - Enjoy and please leave your thoughts and additions!

Note: it's all in bullet-form.

*Okay, so when I bought my house, I loved the house but was feeling very overwhelmed with owning a house all my myself and being the only person responsible for paying the mortgage. So I was determined to pay off the mortgage as quickly as possible. I had a 25 year mortgage, I have lived here for just over 4 years and my mortgage will be paid off by January 2013 (at the latest). After that I will think of myself as having financial freedom.

*Keep in mind, I had nothing when B and I separated.

*So, I bought my house and I literally lived with no new furniture for 2 solid years. All my appliances were bought used and knock on wood, they all still work. I had one chair in my living room from my parents, an old couch from my sister. I had a kitchen table that my grandparents were throwing out (still use that table every single day.) All bedroom furniture was either given to me or I bought at garage sales. Same with tv's, cutlery, dishes, etc. I literally had nothing when I left B except for my clothes, half of C's clothes, and half his toys. Everything else I left.
 

*Okay, so then I made a list of all the things I really, really wanted. To do to the house, to buy, etc. And I prioritized and set goals. So the number one thing I wanted was new kitchen cupboards and furniture for my living room. So I saved for that for 2 years and yes, it was kind of embarrassing that I had nothing but disgusting hand me down furniture but I didn't let it bother me and still had people over. When I re-did the kitchen I realized that I couldn't afford new appliances or granite counter tops but that will come someday.
So I still have a really long list of things I want but like I said, paying off my mortgage is my priority.

*Okay, so when C was little I found a girl who was willing to sell me her second half clothes. C gets a new outfit for back to school, Christmas, and Easter. Aside from that, I LITERALLY don't buy one single thing new for him. It's hard but it has also made it very exciting for him to pick out something new and realize that that's special. And you know what, the second hand clothes are pretty nice. It's not like he ever gets made fun of or looks like a rag-a-muffin.

*Also, by the time they REALLY start caring about name brands and stuff like that, I will have 'financial freedom' and will be able to spend more money on their clothes.

*My best advice on kids bedrooms is this:
Pick a nice bland colour for the walls.C 's is pale blue, C.L's is pale pink and blue, S 's is yellow. Each kids room has a nice generic bedspread. C's is a nice blue quilt with deep maroon sheets. (he has deep maroon curtains) Then when we want to "re-model" his room this is what we do: He has had a Thomas room, a Lightning McQueen Room, and now a Spiderman room. So instead of having to buy new bedding, curtains, and decor, we buy those cling-on things and a new pillow case. Then when anyone asks what they can give him as a gift for b-day I say, oh a Spiderman calendar or a Spiderman picture, or a Spiderman pillow. Whatever, things like that.

*kids toys
Honestly, I am not a big fan of garage sales BUT I go. I look for great deals on toys, buy them, clean them, and put them away for GIFTS for the kids. When I was pregnant with SI didn't buy one single new thing. I got a gorgeous bassinet for $30, a jumperoo for $15, a really nice high chair for $25, etc, etc. All these things I will either give away or re-sell at a garage sale next year. (I have only ever had one garage sale as I"m not a fan but it's a great way to unload toys and baby stuff and get your money back... literally!)

*Anything else my kids want they really have to earn. I might sound mean but C really wants a DS. He tells me he is the only kid in his class who doesn't have one. I could have bought one for his b-day last year but when I saw they are about $150 I just about shit. So I made him set out a plan of how he was going to save for it. He is not allowed to put b-day money towards it b/c that goes into his savings bank account. But he is allowed to use allowance money or any extra money he's earned. Anything that is ABOVE what he is expected to do he gets a little bit of money for. So he's been saving for a DS for a year. Upon realizing that a new DS with games, case, etc is now going to be over $200 we made a diff't plan. I e-mailed friends and family and asked if any of their children was contemplating selling an old DS. We hit a goldmine. For $70 C bought a used DS with a tonne of games, a carrying case, extra pens, the list goes on. He was literally doing jumping jacks around the kitchen, he could NOT contain his own excitement. And he earned every penny... it took him about 13 months to save for his DS and I even debated surprising him on his b-day and just buying him one but now I'm really glad I didn't. There is nothing quite as sweet as the feeling of buying something because you know you earned it and that is something I really want him to know.

* All my kids have 2 bank accounts. An "I can't touch this money account" and a "I'm saving for a ______ account."

* One more tidbit... because everyone is good at something my friends and I do lots of "trades." eg. My sister takes our family photos (individual and family shots), she edits them. In turn I take her FOUR kids for an overnight so she and her husband can go out together and have a sleep-in the next day. I have another friend who (like you, SB) is really good at doing hair and make-up so if I have something special to go to I get her to do my hair and make-up and I, in turn, tutor her child for that same amount of time. (this is NOT my hairdresser, I still have my own hairdresser, but I can't afford to get my hair and make up done every time I want to look pretty). Another friend will give me a pedicure every few months and then I make a meal for her family b/c she hates to cook.

*My mortgage payment & property taxes is every other week. (always do the every other Friday payment if you can b/c it takes 3 or 4 years off your mortgage as opposed to the twice a month payment!) But every Jan 1st, I up my mortgage payment by 20% and have since I bought my house. It makes things tight but it's SO worth it. I save up the max I can put down on my mortgage each year before I put ANY money on renovatiMy parents also took half my pay cheque when I was younger, and although it PISSED me off like CRAZY when I was a teenager I wasn't complaining when they gave me $12,000 throughout my university years.ons.

*I also will not ever own a new vehicle until I am I don't know how old. Like I said, my parents were great examples to me. I grew up with nothing (I'm not kidding, if you saw the house I grew up in, you would want to call CAS). But when I was 14 my parents built a beautiful new house and it was so worth it! Also, my parents both turned 60 this year and my dad bought a brand new truck. They are 60 years old and this was literally the first new vehicle they have ever owned. It's fully loaded, they LOVE it. My mom retired 2 years ago, my dad still works. But my point is that my mom was an A-4 level teacher, my dad works in a lab making about $110,000 / year. But they never chose to spend their money on vehicles. Their vehicles weren't falling apart, they were reliable, but they just weren't flashy. So I have never bought a vehicle in my life that I couldn't buy straight out. I have literally never made a car payment in my life and I never will.

*All money from the government (child tax benefit, baby bonus) goes straight to the kids RESP's. I actually stopped putting money into RRSP's after I bought my house and re-directed that money to my mortgage. HRL is a teacher and therefore has a pension. That being said, though, I do have about $40,000 in RRSP's already b/c my parents drilled it into me to start when I was 18.

*My parents also took half my pay cheque when I was younger, and although it PISSED me off like CRAZY when I was a teenager I wasn't complaining when they gave me $12,000 throughout my university years.

* They wanted to show me just how much money I was squandering and sometimes TOUGH LOVE really is the answer.
By letting E pick things out already "just because" you're honestly not doing her any favours. Again, maybe this sounds mean but when I let C buy a 'treat' at the store, like a pack of gum, he is thrilled for weeks and saves that gum and makes it last for two weeks and well, you get the idea.

* Oh, and C only gets half of his allowance, the other half goes into the bank. He has his own bank account which he is quite proud of.

*Oh, and we really do fun things too! I promise! It's not that we NEVER spend money. Next week we're taking the kids to a hotel in T. that has a pool and a water slide as a "just because" vacation.
Plus Mexico and Disney - all because I could pay for them.
  

*Oh, and I also don't buy many new clothes (as you know). People like you and love you no matter how you dress for the person you are.

*I also love your Friday night dinner as that's what we do here. I get a chicken from SuperStore or cook something from a box. Something with little prep and minimal clean up.

*JL and I also do "date night" once a week which means we put the kids to bed early, make a special meal together and eat it. Then we watch a movie that we have rented from the 99 cent shelf at our corner store. When you never watch new movies, the 99 cent movies aren't reruns. ; ) Sometimes we splurge and get a new rental.... and then we joke about how crazy and reckless we are.

*And we go out for supper with the kids once / month and try to say it's for a special occasion: We take turns picking the restaurant so sometimes it's a nice restaurant and sometimes it's McDonalds.

*Also, all the "art" on my walls is family or friend pictures or art that CL and C have drawn and I've framed. I know that sounds silly but I don't spend money on things to decorate the house. Then, too, when you get tired of the decor, you can just change the pics. Plus it makes the house so much more homey and personal and it reflects me so much more than any real art I could find. I do have a few things hanging up that I received as gifts but I have never spent money on wall hangings.

*Oh, and something else you can put in your blog (if you want) is that I do NOT shop in the States, I don't coupon clip, I don't buy in bulk (because I don't like clutter) I shop LOCAL (aka more expensive) every chance I get. Supporting my own country but especially my own town and spending more money doing it is worth it to me. (but I do buy somethings on-line that I realize is out of the States... like shutterfly)

I HOPE YOU ALL ARE SO SUPER IMPRESSED BY THIS! LEAVE YOUR THOUGHTS AND MAYBE EVEN YOUR TIPS IF YOU CAN! I AM SO SUPER INSPIRED - I WILL CONQUER MY MONEY MISMANAGEMENT! I WILL!

Tweet

Ways to Stretch a Dollar 101

This blurb is me trying to make sense of how to stay in control of my finances - he he! 

(Though, really, not a joke...um...mostly)!

Maybe I'll start with what I know, that's what good writers do, no? (So says Eric Walters, anyhow...)

!

And what do I Know, you ask? Well, I know how to SPEND a dollar! Or - many dollars!

*Here's one thing I've learned I should not do: I should not take e shopping with me. Because I am weak weak weak. No matter what, if she asks for it, for the most part, I am putty, and I'll buy it for her. There  is likely some psychology behind it. I say it's because I am no longer buying for me, so I can justify buying for her. Scratching the itch and all that.

*The second thing is to NOT go grocery shopping ever. Because, if you're a shopper, like myself, then if you're restraining yourself from all frivolous transactions, the grocers becomes that dangerous ONLY place one goes to buy ANYTHING - so everything seems like it should be bought...I am telling you, I've never felt so desperate to buy cleaning products and dog food and lemons and fish and and and...all the things I could rationalize I needed....just to gratify my NEED to shop.

Yes. Entering any place where a monetary transaction is necessary will inevitably be a pit-fall.

*Thirdly, do not let Mechanics or people of that general field into one's house EVER. Even if one's dryer is no longer working and one's washer smells moldier than an old abandoned cottage -- because inevitably, that Mechanic will prey on little old innocent you, and make you spend upwards of $400.00 on NOTHING - or at least on nothing you really needed. And you will feel like you were socked in the stomach - played - had ... it will knock you out, essentially. Especially if that $400.00 is the difference between Christmas gifts or not this year!!!

*Another thing I've learned is to never answer the door to a salesperson while sleep deprived and while trying desperately to keep the two babes who cause the lack of sleep asleep...Because no matter what, in order to shew whomever it is away from the door, one is likely to be coerced into buying ANYTHING. Or maybe just people like myself. 

*Mostly, if you're like me, and you're trying hard to hold on to one or two pennies, it is key not to put oneself into vulnerable situations. I thought staying at home would be okay. Nope. I thought getting necessities would be safe. Nope. 

Some days I resign myself to the thought that maybe in this day-in-age, it is infeasible to save one's money. I mean everything costs something. And I love to shop....

What's the answer?

Well here are ways I've retrained my brain and managed to stretch some of my money:

1. Diluting the apple juice. E is not too happy about this one. However, she drinks so much of it that if I don't we can go through a liter in three days. Easily.

2. Going cash only has helped a lot, but it's also a work in progress. I am still trying to master how to put things in varying categories and build these funds so that all our presents don't cost the measly $5.00 bi-weekly that category is budgeted:). (Sorry to any recipient of said cheap gifts. Please understand:)).

3. Pasta is my friend. My very close friend.

4. I break all dr. b`s finger foods in half so they stretch longer.

5. PC formula is the way to go!

6. I never thought I would say this, but buying in bulk does help: when it`s needs, not wants. And I mean legitimate needs - like diapers....

7. Keeping track of bills so that companies like Rogers who like to start upping bills every so often don`t get away with it! Those crooks!

8. Hanging more clothes than I dry - hydro is $$$$.

9. Being aware of what is going out and coming in - and only using what I have...Well..... Usually. ha ha.

10. Shopping the flyers and creating meals, etc. around what`s on sale.

11. Finding free activities to do - like Mal-O-Ween, or concerts in parks, etc. They can be fun activities! Or using the memberships one already has: Storybook, the Y. And enjoying these social outings, because they are great entertainment!

12. Only buying things like batteries and vitamins when they are on sale.

13. Recognizing and being thankful for what I have. And I have a lot: of clothes, of makeup, of shoes, of outer-ware... and, um. I have a good family, too:)
14. Bulk Barn: sugars and spices and even vitamins can be cheaper here!
15. Getting my hair chopped a little less often. Boo. Hence the ridiculously long locks, my friends!
16. We have junk food Fridays: pizza is usually on the menu, but we also have done eggs and bacon or tortillas and guacamole, etc. Anything junk - even if it's store bought. We can afford this option - rather than wishing we could go out for dinners every friday. It's all psychology. So long as I don't have to put any effort into Friday dinner, I am happy!
17. Reuse ALL bags (including sandwich and bread bags) - that saves hugely on buying needless bags:)

18. I don`t know. I take pride in being a bit more frugal these days. I used to be the girl who`d go out for a night and spend upward of $100.00 just on myself. I`ve come to the realization that, within reason, those days are no longer. I am enjoying trying to create savings and to play the commercial system in my favour to the best of my abilities. I make it a monthly game.

And I enjoy it.

OCD much - he he....!

Anyone else have some pertinent tips???

Tweet

Mama's Got New Lingerie....

This might be tmi - but whatevs.

I propositioned my hubby in a very disgusting, spit-up covered, baby-cereal pasty-coated mess of a sweater ensemble (part lu-lu, part maternity, mix-and-match special)....

I was gonna take a pic of this disgusting outfit for all to see....

but um. it's so embarrassing, that I cannot bring myself to share.

Sorry...

And jb? well, it's a good thing boys are sometimes oblivious...

But I am sure it wasn't his favourite lingerie outfits...

Tweet

Boning Up...he he.

Alright, my friends. Did I properly grab your attention?

I hope so.

Cuz I have some very important questions and I hope you can take a moment or two to help me out.

If you've talked to me EVER, but more particularly, in the last little while (as in as my Mat Leave progresses and my disposable funds digress), then you know that I. Am. On. A. Mission!

That is right, my friends. I am on a very serious quest here!

Maybe I'm bored. 

Maybe I just need some cause on which to focus my ever distracted attention.

Or maybe I am really in a place in which I truly need to focus my full attention on this cause.

Okay people. Talk to me. How can I pinch my pennies and make them into $100.00 bills, yo?

Yup. That's right.

I need some magic money management guidance, please!!!

Do you pinch pennies?

Are you good at it?

I generally pick them up and throw them away.

It is not just a metaphor for how I, the proverbial Aries, treat money, I am afraid...I seriously pick them up and throw them away. I mean, what are they good for anyway???

---

Being a fairly impulsive personality, money and I have always had a love-hate kind of relationship. I do love to shop, you see: if I see it, I want it, I buy it.

And in the moment...my new items fill me with true, undying, head-in-the clouds, nothing else matters, love...

It's that easy.

And why not?

But then I get my bills.

And you guessed it!

I am no longer in love. 

Well....maybe less in love....

-----

Shopping and spending and money are a fun little hobby of mine. I even love grocery shopping. It's a metaphor for life, you know, grocery shopping. When one walks in to the abundant grocer, the possibilities are endless, and I can buy whatever I want.

And I can provide....

But I am learning that I need to sim sim simmer....I don't need clothes, nor can I really afford them. And, while I'd love to buy e every little item she picks off the shelf as the must-have, I really cannot do that either....

I am asking myself to go against my natural inclinations, people!!!

AND I NEED YOUR HELP.

You see, along with being an excellent shopper and an impulsive personality, I am also really sh*tty with details, and budgets, I am afraid, ask for detail, precision, discipline...

However, that said, I have decided that I am doing this!

I am swinging full throttle to the other side of the pendulum and trying to do EVERYTHING I can to suck in the belt, stretch the dollar, trim the fat....

Sounds like a diet, no?

Well, it might turn into that if I cannot afford my groceries!!!

Ha!

But seriously.

My question for y'all is how do you stretch your funds? Do you have savings?

How do you try and budget for the everyday and for the future?

I am looking for tricks.

Old fashioned, new wave, whatever ya got!

Please help me. I am not above groveling!

I am totally going against my own grain here, and I have to really stretch my mind, understand the abstract, speak a new language, and all that. 

I am finding money and saving that difficult to master.

For instance, I just switched dr b's formula from his $40.00 for 32oz X 6 days a week hypoallergenic gold to the PC $15.00 for a similar amount.

I determined that I was saving a whopping $376.00 or so. To be fair, I can't be COMPLETELY sure of the savings as PC measures in weight, not volume, so I am not sure the conversions are really equal.

Regardless!

After accomplishing this crazy-ass-feat (which, by the way, I am not sure is really helping my son as he is all phlegm-y and puke-y, and has a rash...but he is also teething, so I am persevering with slight guilt...), I realized that the replacement of formula to save money, while a good and frugal idea, was still not enough for me to consider myself a savvy shopper and money-conscious individual. 

No....

No.

I was still being my usual, frivolous Aries self, rationalizing that I'd already saved money; I was always making 7 oz bottles, (you know, in case dr b was STARVING or something) and often throwing out three or so ounces. 5 X 3 would be 15 oz a day X 6 = A hell of a lot of formula and $$$ down the drain (literally!) 

So one week and three days in and I've mended my ways.

I am thinking this whole being a money conscious, paired-down individual is going to always be a work-in-progress, and a battle of wills and wants with me...

So your help and your ideas are very much appreciated!

What else can I do to cut corners?

And btw, while asking this, please remember that I am not allowed to touch jb's television, HD, sports, or Internet...Or his allowance....ahem, budgeted earnings (?)

What else can I do???

Thanks in advance for reading, considering, and attempting to better me in this oh so frustrating and essential life skill. 

UGH.

Oh. And I am almost one month down and I've not bought clothes yet!

Only 11 and a bit to go!!!

Tweet

Mommy's Found Her Groove....

I don't know about you, but staying at home with babes two and under (even my own), is not an idea I really relished. I mean, I love my kids, more than anything or anyone, but days with kids are long...I remember counting down the seconds when I used to babysit. 

So Mat Leave  Number Two was not really an exciting prospect for me. Again. I love my kids, I really do. I just wasn't sure how long the days would feel...And I figured my social life would be on hiatus, too. And I love being social, sometimes, you know!

Well, I am now over half-way through my Leave and life is beyond swell.

In fact, we've hit a wonderful stride all around, my family and I!

We have a morning routine to which I even actually look forward when one of my darling children awakes me from my slumber  (naturally, way earlier than I'd really like.)~!

We spend a good hour or more every morning just hanging out, eating, playing, cartooning, etc. It's actually quite relaxing and special.

No one ever has to rush anywhere (especially not for the first two hours, bringing us to the nice, ripe hour of eight a.m.!)...I know!  Why, that's practically lunch time!!!

.... 

AND!

I've come to learn from our morning nonchalance, that I actually like not rushing to be someplace or do something! (who knew!?)

Apres our morning dalliance, we often have an activity planned of some sort, whether it be sign language, or e and me hitting the gym for a swim, or us all visiting a friend, or on e's twice weekly daycare days, I can be found cleaning, cooking, or napping (when dr b naps, of course!)...

And after our early lunch, on good days, e and dr b and I all nap for two hours. 

Sigh.

Our life is pretty darn sweet, especially with the birth of  our symbiotic napping schedule--which, btw, is an accomplishment that has taken me a long time and a lot of orchestrating and trial and error to execute! (There are some very frustrating days when one is down, the other up, then the other's down...you get the idea)...

After naps is usually bath and/or walks (never walk a baby before nap-time, I've learned, unless I don't want my own break as well!).

Then it's dr b's dinner, e's snack and then hang outs until five. Then dr b naps, e watches tv (very happily) and I make dinner.

Finally, jb comes home, we all (dr b included), sit down to a nice meal (some food may or may not be thrown of some high chairs, AND, some curse words and exacerbated frustrations may be uttered... but that's really neither here nor there)... It. is. still. a wonderful experience!

And then, of course, there's the 7 and 7:30 bed-time routine that I have now managed to complete all by myself! (jb is so super sad about this new routine, I have to say...er. NOT)

Yes, peeps, Super Mom really has found her groove!

First, e and dr b get all changed into their bed-clothes. e's bottle is made, and she is set up on the couch, at which point I bring dr b upstairs and feed him his bottle and settle him in for the night...I return to e, we do our book, kisses, flying into bed, fans turned on, music repepepepeating (Selena Gomez anybody???)

And then the clock ticks.

It's 7:30ish .... I make my way down the stairs to prepare my tea and nibs...(my nightly vice if you're not my fb friend:)!)

...And every night I always think, 'it's 7:30, do you know where your kids are?' And I smile to myself...

....and then one of my kids wakes up and humbles me back to reality (some nights):)

!!!

It's a crafted and pride-inducing routine and makes me think of the start of the movie About a Boy. Life really is "units of time, each unit consisting of no more than thirty minutes. Full hours can be a little bit intimidating and most activities take about half an hour. Taking a bath: one unit, watching countdown: one unit, web-based research: two units, exercising: three units, having my hair carefully disheveled: four units. It's amazing how the day fills up...."

I really do think, as a mom, I thrive on those units of time! They are the way to go. Much easier to deal with the ever-expansive, 12 hour, child-filled days (of wonder and awe that I utterly enjoy....ahem...) And I find, now that we have our units organized and pretty, I am actually not feeling bored or wondering when bed-time is...or when jb is gonna get home!!! (reminding me yet again of my baby-sitting days when I basically sat by the door, willing the parents to get home by the end of a long day!!!)

As an aside, I will admit, with full disclosure, that JB has, in the past,(on MANY occasions) seen me sitting on our bottom step, with my face plastered with desperation to the front window, LONGING for him to GET THE HELL HOME!!!!

But NOW!

Now we've found our groove, people! I feel, usually, that I have no need for saving at all, as I've found my groove. And I'm in no rush for any of it to change at all...

Though, sadly, I know it will.

In close, I am proud to think about how far we've come, and the hurdles we've leaped over in the past six months...Oh Maternity Leave, Thou Art Way Too Short...

--

and I often wonder, to be absolutely honest, if I'd ever have time for a job; how do people cram them in? (About a Boy)

Stay tuned for tomorrow's post wherein I completely contradict and negate all the strides I've discussed here today!

Tweet

Shopping - Shopping - Shopping!

Okay. I am going to make a promise here to you today and I am going to try to stick to it!

(After I make the following statement, I am sure most of you will roll your eyes and say, 'Yah, right')...

Regardless,

Here goes:

I am going to attempt not to buy ANY clothes, shoes, accessories for a full year (for myself).

Let's see, today is September the...23rd. 

Can I do it?

I am seriously going to try.

What prompted this goal, you might ask?

Well, yesterday, as is usual of this time of year, I got into fall cleaning mode: out with the summer-ware, in with the fall-winter ware. And I realized something astonishing. I have a sh*t load of clothes!

You might already have known this...

But I did not.

Not really.

But after having two babies, I have clothes that fit me within a sixty lb range. 

SERIOUSLY!

Impressive, non?

And what I am very proud of myself for doing is thus (*ahem): last year I did my maternity shopping solely at H&M.

But do they have a maternity section?, you might be asking yourself...

Um. No.

However, the styles of late have been about big tops, sweater dresses, leggings, etc. All clothing styles that work well with growing bellies.

So those were the styles I bought. And guess what? They're still in style this year.

And I will be starting at a new school next March, so for many weeks, every outfit I wear will be brand-new to them...

(Not that I am deluded into thinking anyone else REALLY cares what I am wearing)...

But it's a good thing all the same.

And so, after unloading two separate wardrobes, and the in-between stage outfits as well, I've come to the conclusion that there is sincerely no need for buying new clothes.

Also, some outfits I bought some five or more years ago (even before I started my official teaching gig), I am looking at with new fashion eyes: I can see new ways to wear them, new combinations to try!

I shopped my closet people! And I liked it! In fact, it's the only budget, price, option I can afford these days...

Goodness. I might be maturing..

I am putting my money into savings rather than spending it on clothes...

I might need to stay OUT of stores, including anything JOE FRESH related, though...Or I MIGHT be in T-R-O-U-B-L-E! Want vs. Need and all that...

Do you think I can do this?????

.....

However, all this said, maybe you noticed?

Nowhere in this post did I say anything about not buying make-up.

I mean really, let's be realistic here!

Tweet

Philosophy

I took e for a walk tonight. And she took her baby for a walk in her baby's little umbrella stroller. While most people choose to walk on the sidewalk and make their walk easier, e decided to fight through the grass instead. She was often stuck, exclaiming emphatically 'I stuck!' But this constant issue did not dissuade her or motivate her to change her route.

Nope.

She is my daughter.

My mom asked me once why I chose not to listen to her advice or learn from her mistakes.

My response was thus (ahem): Because MOM. I want to make my own mistakes, fall on my own ass, and learn at my own pace, in my own time, in my own way.

Like e is proving, I liked the hard road way better. I enjoyed jumping head first into and at life no matter the cost or the resistance.

Even with my imploring with her to take the easier path, e, too, seems to enjoy the tougher path. 

Oh dear.

Tweet

Weaning and The Like....

So, if you're my friend on fb then you know that this was the week I decided to move dr b out of my room (not my bed, my friends, calm now....), and into his big boy room and his much roomier crib.

My heart hurt.

My tummy was in knots.

My eyes were all welled up.

He looked so tiny.

And the crib was ever-expansive.

I nearly rationalized our way out of this messy weaning process. 

But no. I was committed.

Mostly for other selfish reasons, like ensuring e did not come barging into our room ONE MORE TIME waking dr b up from his slumber and thus starting my juggling act earlier than necessary.

No. Having dr b in his own room would mean, I am hoping, that he would get to sleep more peacefully and I will get to enjoy this fact.

However; this whole weaning thing sucks ass, people.

It does.

For people like me who used to cry at the summer's end when I knew that I was either going back to work or school and jb was doing the same and our summer of fun and bliss and all that would be no longer.

Yup.

Me and change are like oil and water.

But it's actually much more than that really.

With e things seemed to move a lot slower, though my feelings were equally intense (it is me we're talking about, right?! I mean come on!)!

But the phases seemed to be longer and everything about her first year seemed to, in retrospect, move slower.  

Even jb was surprised when I woke up one day and said it was time to move dr b out. He thought it was way sooner than we had done it with e.

Nope I said. It was the exact same time: beginning of the school year. In fact, it was actually, considering their two week birthday difference, a bit later for dr b.

But with child number two everything seems to have amplified and sped itself up. Not being able to nurse after eleven weeks broke me. His smiles break me.

The fact that he will be six months in three days....breaks me.

With e, I did not consider future children. I was all about her. She was my world.

With dr. b, I do. I also think, there is a chance this might be it. And so every new phase, every new 'wean' is more intense to me. I think, this special moment might be the last. Having my little infant sleeping soundly and safely at my side in this moment, well it might be the last time I get to experience this joy.

And it is a joy.

I love being mother and protector. I love the idea that I've created a womb-like safe and secure environment for my children in my room, in our home, etc.

And with every change, every growth, I feel like the umbilical cord is stretching. And it's not they who are suffering or suffocating from this reality, it's me.

Can one have empty nest when her kids are still two and under, I wonder?

Anyhow, suffice it to say, that first of all I don't do change all that well; though I do know that change is a good thing and that there are many good things to come.

Just know that I am loving every moment (except those brief colicky periods--ew!) of my baby's infancy and I just want to hold the moments and memories so tightly that they don't ever get forgotten or disregarded.

I know that I am a lucky woman.

And I know my babes are precious.

And I know, second time around, how great the phases are, and how fast they move...

Every moment feels like another wean has to take place: from womb, from boob, from bedroom, from bottle, from home...sigh. I just want to wrap my babes up, hold onto their baby stages as long as I can, and keep them as all mine for a little longer before the world gets at them.

I love their innocence. I love their beauty. I love this whole experience.

The End. 

For today:-)

Tweet

Life After iPhone

Last Maternity Leave, I was acquainted with the wonderful blogging world. I felt revitalized, renewed, tech-savvy even! When I went back to work and was presented with new technologies I could use in my classroom, I was not afraid, I was pumped! After all, I was now a pro at all things technology, thanks to my days blogging and htmling, etc....

Nothing to this technology stuff, I thought!!! (In years past, though, I would cower at the idea of trying anything new in the technology realm...)

This Maternity Leave, I've become acquainted with the wonderful iPhone. Since the world of blogging is often referred to as the blogosphere,  I feel like the iPhone should be called the iPhonesphere, because it too opens up a whole new world of possibilities, of thinking, of being. 

(Sounds dramatic, but it's true!)

Not only have I, the world's worst photographer--(not only am I bad at taking good shots, I rarely take the time to even pull out a camera to take a picture)--become a both a photographer and video-grapher, but it's actually been a natural and easy progression!

I know!!

I am pretty much addicted to documenting, in fact! And what perfect timing too, as my children are growing, I want to be sure to document their phases and stages. I am always taking a picture or videoing something new that they are accomplishing. And I feel so engaged and involved;-)....

It's awesome.

And going out for a night on the town with my iPhone means getting some really fun stills of my friends. AND if I lose my friends (even under the same roof), I simply have to text them, and voila!I can find them!

Life is good with the iPhone;-)...

Not only is it good for documenting and orienting, the iPhone is also good for communicating. If you know me, you know that my hubby and I get along really well, and we also fight really well. We're equals in every way, which means we meet equally eye to eye or when we don't quite agree, it`s with similar conviction.

What does the iPhone have to do with this fact you might ask?

...

Well, the iPhone has permitted us to express ourselves possibly a bit better. My apology sounds just that bit more sincere in a text format

...

My explanation seems a bit more considered

...

My texts are more honest sounding sometimes than my voice

...

Odd, but true. Maybe more intimate thoughts come from brain to finger than from brain to voice?

I was always told I didn't think before I spoke...Maybe I am more considerate when I type?

hmm...

Another bonus with the iPhone? Well, I have to say this one is my hands down favourite: I can track my diet and fitness regiment. In fact, I would say that there is no excuse for me to not keep myself fit and healthy with this trusty little iPhone friend of mine. Not only can I use MyFitnessPal to track (and even scan) my foods to ensure I am eating the proper quantities and nutrients, I can now track all my workouts through NIKEPlus and iPhone. 

I know, right? 

Awesome.

And not only that, I can play the most up-to-date music from my new App, TuneinRadio, and I am never bored on the treadmill...

Each new song is a surprise...Unlike in the olden days when I had my trusty portable CD player with my finite CD selection and redundant music choices...

Now everything about working out seems vast, infinite and exciting.

And it's all because of my trusty new iPhone.

Along with all these wonderful new Apps and abilities my iPhone offers, I am also more able to stay in contact with people. I figure this phone is gonna make me more popular!

I can fb whenever and wherever I want! I can twitter away all day if I so choose!!!

(though I need more friends to follow - any takers???)

...But most importantly, I can text rather than telephone whomever! And I like that...People can reach one another and reply to one another in their own convenient time rather than immediately--very important for all the moms and dads out there who have to contend with naps, dinner-making, bed-time, bath-time, cleaning, tantrums, etc...All these incidences in a day leave very little time for actual immediate conversing...but a text, WELL, that's do-able!

Again, I'd say me texting is better than me talking any day;-)!

Oh! And I almost forgot! I am more current than I ever used to be. Being the little busy, frenetic girl that I am, sitting down to a newspaper was really not my thing...But now, with all my newspaper Aps and PerezHilton Aps (hey, that's news, too, isn't it???), well now, I am pretty up-to-date on events...


Never mind that all I really need to do to get my news is read my friends' status updates or the recent trending tweets on twitter;-)...


I am so current, I might even be future...


um...did that make sense...

The only downfall to this whole iPhone thing, I'd say, is that I may possibly be too connected, (I might even say I sometimes am a bit over-present on fb)....However, I bet one day that such a notion of being over-exposed or being too connected will no longer exist...

It will be the norm...

I really enjoy being up-to-date with technology and am hoping to figure out ways to use this knowledge in the classroom, with Trending Walls, and Twitter Tweets, and fb Status Updates....And also by syncing my iPhone with my future Mac Book, IPad, etc., with my Smart Board, so I can teach with my trusty technologies!

Being a good teacher means knowing the same if not more than my students when it comes to technology and Media - so I hope to continue to learn and use all my new gadgets and Internet lingo in my classroom on a daily basis.

And all of this advancing on my part? -- could not have happened without my iPhone. 

I heart my iPhone.

The End.

(ps - I hope you know I am always slightly hyperbolic in what I say...you can determine what`s exaggerated;-)!)

Tweet